reallyreallyreallytrying:

yo how much dirt you gotta throw in the ocean to make a new country

(via thehobbutts)

swimminginmainstream:

held a door open for a girl today and didn’t even get a blowjob. so tired of getting friend zoned.

(via joeokeefe)

baracknobama:

dont you hate it when you put toothpaste on your toothbrush but then it just falls right off like wtf toothpaste do your job

(via joeokeefe)